This paper uses 2005 Malawian data to investigate the link between crime and happiness in Malawi. Detailed descriptive statistics reveal that crime is a gendered issue and econometric analyses show that males and females respond differently to different crime variables. In particular, for males being attacked has a negative impact on happiness and neighbourhood crime rates have a U-shaped effect on happiness with happiness at its lowest when 11.2% of respondents in a neighbourhood reported being a victim. For females only a subjective feeling of insecurity impacts negatively on happiness.